Symptom or something else?

What is the line between keeping ourselves informed and knowing too much? We know as much about lymphoma treatment as we can without having experienced it for ourselves. We've also read about all of the symptoms of Hodgkin's and non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. This means we know what to look for and what to report to the various doctors, but this also means we're staring at every tiny thing and wondering if this is a progression of the disease.

Pain, itching and bruising are symptoms. William's swollen leg itches at times, hurts all of the time, and his foot looks flushed. We can be pretty certain that these symptoms are due to the extreme edema caused by the lymphoma. But what of the itching back? Is that just a back itch or is that the disease? He has a tiny bruise on his arm, is that just a bruise or is it the lymphoma?

He has been coughing until he vomits all weekend, he was nauseated all day yesterday and couldn't keep food down until well into the afternoon. Is this the monster? His diaphragm hurts and feels tight. Is this the result of the vomiting or his muscles complaining about the stress test he had on Friday? Is the vomiting a delayed reaction to all of the crap they've dumped into his veins for all the many tests this week? Is the monster attacking this quickly and violently?

We need to know. We don't want to know.