Could I find a good surgeon on Craig's List?

I became almost desperate enough to put an ad on Craig's List looking for a General Surgeon who gives a shit. I was ready to call the local news channels and put my, now quite haggard looking, face on TV begging for an hour of a surgeon's time. If Craig's list and the news channel hadn't worked I might have just told William to lie down while I sterilized an exacto knife and numbed his neck with a bottle of ambesol.

The search for a surgeon has been going on, supposedly, since last week. I've been checking in at the oncologists office about it and they've professed multiple problems with getting Insurance authorization, finding a doctor in our insurance program, etc. This week I called and they said they'd found a doctor, had faxed him our records and told him it was STAT. I was told this surgeon's office would call me. They didn't. I called the oncologist back today and was again told the other doctor's office was supposed to call me. I answered "Well, they haven't, may I have their number please?"

I couldn't get through the damned maze of an answering system to a real person. I left a message and 3 hours later got a call back. They wanted to schedule an "Initial Consult". I asked if we could also schedule the biopsy at this time so we didn't have to wait another week. I was transferred to the "surgery scheduler". I asked her that since we had to make all possible haste on this biopsy, if I could go ahead and get the surgery scheduled for next week since we'd be seeing the doctor for the consult on friday. She said "Well, yeah. I guess. But he won't be having surgery until well into January anyway so I don't see how it makes a difference".

"Umm. This is supposed to be a STAT. This is lymphoma. We need that biopsy in order to start Chemo."

"Your doctor's office didn't tell me it was STAT"

"They told me they told you it was STAT when they faxed you our records."

"Well, our doctor isn't even going to be here. He's on vacation until the New Year."

"Did you tell my Oncologists office that?"

"They didn't ask." (I kid you not. She said "They didn't ask")

"Do you not generally volunteer that kind of information when a doctor's office calls to make a surgery appointment?"

"I don't appreciate being spoken to like I'm an idiot."

No. I was good. I did not say what I was thinking. Hopefully I was thinking LOUD enough for her to hear it though.

My cork blew. It was 1:20pm and I was still getting the "Our office is closed from 12:00 to 1:00" message on the oncologist's answering machine. I grabbed the truck keys and hit the road. I was loaded for rabid bull elephants.

"Do you have an appointment?"

"No, I would just like to speak to the Dr."

"Are you a patient?"

"No, my husband is the patient?"

"Does he have an appointment?"

"No. It's just me. I would like to speak to my husband's doctor. I'm in no rush. I will see him at his convenience. I'll just sit here and read. I'll be absolutely fine even if I need to wait all afternoon."

I didn't even have time to open a magazine. The nurse called me back. I explained the problem to the nurse. The Dr. came in, perched on the exam table, and I told him the problem. I told him that if my husband's biopsy could wait a couple of months and if his treatment could start in a few months and everything would be fine, then he needed to tell me now. He said in his completely calm and kind way "You won't have to wait". He says these things and the look in his eyes says "You can trust me." and I do.

His nurse remembered that she had a friend who worked scheduling surgery. One phone call to her friend and we have an appointment for a consult on Friday and an appointment for the biopsy on Monday. That little nurse is a team player on the side of the patient. This is good. I can trust her too. That makes two doctors and a nurse, willing to play on the buddy system.

They had to see my red eyes and I had to see the whites of theirs and we got this done. The phone tag plan wasn't working. Lesson learned on all sides.

The monster got shoved into a corner.